Breastfeeding

There is a prevailing area of discourse in regards to the reaction of men towards breastfeeding mothers where the men take the staunch position of "keep that private! it is disgusting to do in public!".  This needs to change.  This entire view of breastfeeding needs to change.  I would, however, like to offer maybe some form of information on HOW these ideas could come about.  I'm sure this isn't all encompassing and people arrive at their conclusions through many different ways.  Instead, this is my experience and assessment only.

It is a very easy mentality to fall into as a male.  Sadly, I did as well for a long time until I actually thought about it and engaged with women who deal with it.  Men's experience with the topic tends to be very limited or non-existent, many times through no fault of their own.  We don't breastfeed.  We don't have any utility or purpose for breasts other than sexuality (especially when we are younger and haven't had kids).  It is a distorted view that forms due to a utility that we simply do not have and thus, we cannot understand on our own.  Our social experience of breasts is that women sometimes make them look more prominent while attracting a mate.  That is all our experience tends to be with them in many cases, especially when we are young, going through puberty, and forming our world view and taboos.  Our culture deems the level of breast exposure to be directly correlated to the level of sexual attraction the woman is trying to exude.  Thus, it is so often embedded in men's minds from their childhood that breasts are associated with sexual activity.  Sexual activity is a taboo in the public eye.  When a man sees a woman breastfeeding, yes, he knows the basic utility behind it.  However, that cultural taboo of sexuality coupled with a complete lack of any ability to relate is SO blinding and strong that our brains just immediately condemn it.  It is knee-jerk rather than thought out.  To make it worse, the sexual taboo often restricts men from being part of any meaningful discussion about any topic regarding breasts.  So most just shy away from learning or even engaging at all.

This is not justification of this behavior.  Women should breastfeed when and where they please, 100%.  It is simple biology and that is that.  However, I say this just as insight as to the underlying reason why some men have these reactions so that we can begin to potentially attack the problem at the source rather than after the fact.  We need education on the topic and we need the taboo of sex lifted from our culture.  We need to not keep quiet on the topic and just expect men to learn magically on their own.  Men need to be invited into the conversation and have open dialog with women so that we can get a non-skewed understanding.  That is what helped me anyway.  If I get assaulted by "you're just oppressing women and you are a terrible person!" by an army of women who don't even know where my views formed from, then I'm probably not going to even attempt to understand your point of view.